I’ve been experiencing a lot of pressure/pain/blockage/SOMETHING in my solar plexus over the past couple of days. And quite honestly, it has me a bit distraught. It’s uncomfortable. It makes it difficult to breath with any sort of depth and feel relaxed about it. It’s unnerving. And I’m not quite sure what to do about it.
I keep hoping it’s an enlightenment bubble ready to burst out the top of my head (“To Infinity, and Beyond!”), but I realize this might be wishful thinking.
It seems better after a night of sleep, but quickly sneaks back in to my physical being before I can really assess things. I have a history of tensing and holding my abs, and releasing them is something I’ve been trying to work with lately, but this isn’t helping. It’s been some time since I’ve had troubles with acid reflux, and this feels very much unlike anything I remember. There have been other times (however momentary) where I’ve had trouble taking what felt like a full breath, usually while on an empty stomach, but again, there was never this focus around any particular body region. I also had a really great solo asana practice the other day, but that was after this solar plexus thing started, and while it was an intense practice, nothing stands out as something that could have exacerbated this.
I can’t help but think that it’s all related to my breathing in my meditation practice. I’ve been spending some time checking in with my body this morning: What’s going on with that solar plexus thing now? How the hell am I supposed to know? Are my abs tight? Yes. Can I release my abs? Sure. Does that help? Maybe? I can still feel it lingering though, even if I’m able to relax my abs and allow things to (for lack of a better word) sink. It doesn’t feel like I’m holding in that particular place necessarily, it just feels like…a knot.
I don’t really know what any of this means, but I figured I’d put it out there, as it’s largely what’s been on my mind these past few days. I’m trying to be gentle with myself. I’m trying to let it go and start again. But it’s been a while since I’ve had a physical sensation as persistent as this one. Having just finished reading “Mindfulness and the Body” in Sharon’s book, I’m interested to explore this a bit more over the coming days.