Not Getting Arrested for Beating Myself Up

For a few years I was involved with a men’s group. We did some fantastic and very honest work together. One of the guys, Itay Arad, responded to one of my self-lacerating rants with this comment: “with the way you beat yourself up, you’re going to get arrested.” It was so dead-on accurate and funny I use it on myself and others.

At Day 6, I feel as though I’m making progress in being more forgiving of myself. A key goal of my mindfulness practice is to be aware of my body in space, and be less of a klutz. Yesterday I knocked a juice glass onto the kitchen floor. It shattered into hundreds of little pieces.

Now, normally I’d be all over myself and look for something/someone else to blame. I’ve said things to myself like: “f(orget) this mindfulness s—-. I’m a klutz. We all just have to deal with it.”

I didn’t do that. Part of why was that I had a toddler in the next room and it needed to be cleaned up right away — there was no time to rip myself a new one. But after that was done, I was calm and moved on to the next thing. For me, that’s progress.


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